There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
