God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Randomize
