look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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