This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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