Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Randomize