I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
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