Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
