I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
You may now shotgun with the bride
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Randomize
