is your mom at the bar?
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
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