I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
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