She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
I don't think brook has ever known best
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
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