we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Randomize
