can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
