how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize