This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
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I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
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Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.