this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Randomize
