im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
