i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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