I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
