You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
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