She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
