I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Help. Why am I so naked?
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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