drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Randomize
