Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
