pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
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