Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize