I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
