On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
is that a dick in a sweater?
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
