I just saw a hot homeless man
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
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