I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
25 Shocking High School Scandals You Won’t Believe Are True
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
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