yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
