just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
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Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
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why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
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