the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
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Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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