dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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