it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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