I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
