But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
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