Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Randomize