Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
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