It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize
