erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
is it fun? or sober?
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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