Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
