This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Randomize
