If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
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