wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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