I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Randomize