I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
I know her cup size but not her name....
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