I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Randomize
