He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
