Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
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